


For The First Time

by sweetlolixo



Category: the GazettE
Genre: Alternate Universe - Married Life, Domestic Fluff & Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-28
Updated: 2016-06-28
Packaged: 2018-07-18 20:02:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7328530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetlolixo/pseuds/sweetlolixo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>They’d just gotten married, just a couple of months ago, after Uruha had worked out a plan and was sure he could provide for the both of them with his accounting income. Uruha always prided himself on the fact that he could give Aoi a good life, better than most people, but now Aoi’s been forced to scrimp and save just for Uruha’s inadequacy, and it kills the blond silently, deep inside.</em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	For The First Time

**Author's Note:**

> Fic originally posted onto LiveJournal [here](http://sweetlolixo.livejournal.com/179164.html) on April 14, 2013.

“You’re back from work already?”  
  
Uruha’s not even made it past the front door, but as soon as it opens, Aoi’s already jumped up against the blond’s body, hugging him tightly, never mind the fact that it had been a long day at work and the blond feels sticky and sweaty from the long hours of waitressing. Uruha nods his head, chuckling, trying to close the door behind him with the raven haired latched onto him. Aoi tips up on his toes, planting a soft kiss against the blond’s cheek, running his fingers up Uruha’s messy head of hair. The blond’s face is ignited with a blush immediately, and he brushes a hand down through his lover’s own hair, giving him a light squeeze.  
  
“How was your first day of work? Was it good?” Aoi’s hands slip underneath the blond’s shoulders to remove his coat, tucking it under his arm, moving to the clothes stand by the side to hang it up. “Were the people there nice? If they’re mean, you know you can quit, right?”  
  
Uruha pauses in thought at Aoi’s question, then silently shakes his head, forcing a smile upon his lips. “They’re nice, Aoi.” And he’s not lying, really. He’s made a few friends at the restaurant already, though it would never have occurred to him he would ever have to work such a job. But the economy now is bad, and he had just got laid off his accounting job, something that had severely changed both his life and Aoi’s. They’d just gotten married, just a couple of months ago, after Uruha had worked out a plan and was sure he could provide for the both of them with his accounting income. Aoi was still studying, pursuing his own degree, and Uruha doesn’t want him to have to work a job to support himself, so he had been confident he’d be able to provide for the both of them. But the recent retrenchment of work due to the economic downturn had meddled with those plans a little, and Aoi had offered to find a job himself, but Uruha had refused, claiming he wanted the raven to focus on his studies, and let the blond deal with the rest.  
  
It’d been rough, trying to find a job, but Uruha had finally gotten one, just a simple waitressing job at their local restaurant downtown. It wasn’t going to be something permanent, of course; but they had bills to pay, and he couldn’t keep hoping for anything better in this economy. So he’ll have to make do with the long hours and minimum wage, first, just for survival, and then when the economy gets better, maybe he could find a better job again. Aoi’s been completely understanding so far, and it pains the blond to think that the raven has to deal with this, has to deal with _him_. Because they’ve had to cut down on eating at Aoi’s favorite restaurants, cut down on their usual groceries, and Aoi doesn’t even have the benefit of having Uruha drive him to school anymore, and has to resort to taking the bus again. Uruha always prided himself on the fact that he could give Aoi a good life, better than most people, but now Aoi’s been forced to scrimp and save just for Uruha’s inadequacy, and it kills the blond silently, deep inside.  
  
“I know you’ve worked a long day, ‘ruha,” Aoi smiled sadly up to the blond, embracing him once more, squeezing him tight. “I’m almost done with dinner, alright? Go off and take a shower, and come back to the kitchen for dinner. I made your favorite fish, so that’s something to look forward to, okay?”  
  
Uruha nods, staring down to the raven, and wondering just how Aoi can stay so positive, can remain so happy, when reality was crumbling down on the both of them, when reality wasn’t going the way both of them had planned for from so long ago.  
  
~  
  
“I hope the fish is good…” Aoi says, looking to the blond concernedly, wondering why Uruha was getting so quietly lately. But he doesn’t question it; only encouraging the blond to eat more, placing more food onto his plate. “I had to steam it for two hours just to perfect it.”  
  
“It’s really good, Aoi.” Uruha fakes a smile once more, forcing more food past his lips, and he doesn’t know why he’s so solemn today. He should be happy; he’d been looking forward to seeing Aoi the whole time he was at work, but now that he was back at home, he’s had to face with the fact that he’s not enough for Aoi anymore, that Aoi was suffering being with him. He doesn’t say much, just gobbles down the food angrily, ignoring the raven seated opposite him who kept trying to get him to talk.  
  
“Was work really tiring?” Aoi asks, a little hurt by the unresponsive blond today, who seemed more and more disinterested in being in the raven’s company by the second. “I understand it must be hard, Uru. Were the customers bad? Maybe I should visit sometime.”  
  
Uruha finishes the last of his food. “No, I want you to concentrate on your studies for now. Aren’t the final exams coming up?”  
  
Aoi makes a reluctant nod. “Yeah, they are. But it’s fine, I got this! I won’t let you down, I promise.”  
  
The blond smiles a little at that. “You’ll do well, won’t you?”  
  
“Yeah, I will!” Aoi answers, determinedly, and Uruha laughs at that. “You’ll have to work hard as well, okay, Uru? When I finish my degree, I promise I’ll try to find a job as soon as possible. It’ll be fine, I promise.”  
  
Uruha looks away uncomfortably with that mention. “You don’t have to, you know. I’ll do fine on my own.”  
  
“No, it’s okay.” Aoi reaches a hand out to cup over Uruha’s own one. “I know how hard it is for you now. Plus… more bills came in today.” The blond’s face pales quickly.  
  
“Do we have enough this month?” Uruha asks in a slight whisper, almost afraid, because he knows Aoi has been calculating their expenses for awhile now, and he wonders if what they have currently is enough to tide them over for another month. He knows they’re slowly running out of money, because everything is getting more and more expensive and _even_ Uruha’s previous savings can’t keep up at the rate that they’re spending it. Aoi’s eyes flicker away, and it makes the blond panic a little, because it _can’t_ be good news.  
  
“We’ll have to pay for the rent of our apartment… And then the groceries, the electricity and water bill, and… we barely scraped through.” Aoi bit his lip, looking down to his plate. “What we have is enough to pay them, for now. So… yeah, it’s okay, Uru. We’ll be okay.” But the way Aoi keeps looking away is disturbing Uruha a little; he _knows_ the raven is hiding something from him, because he’s been with Aoi long enough to know how Aoi acts when he doesn’t want to tell Uruha something. And Uruha feels slightly angry, because right now he needs Aoi’s trust more than anything in the world. And if _even_ the raven doesn’t tell him things he should know, then Uruha doesn’t know what to do.  
  
“Is there anything else, Aoi?” Uruha questions, his tone louder than before, and Aoi shrinks back, feeling a little intimidated. “You know I hate it when you lie to me.”  
  
“I know! I just…” Aoi looks back up to the blond quickly, meeting with the blond’s tired eyes. “Just…” He fiddled with his hands a little. “I need to get more textbooks again, and I’ll have to pay for my exams…”  
  
Uruha’s heart sinks instantly; was that what the raven was hiding from him? If Aoi wasn’t planning to ask Uruha to help him with those expenses, then where else was the raven going to get the money from? And suddenly the blond feels useless, again, thoroughly useless over and over once more.  
  
“How much?” The blond mouths, and Aoi turns away, shaking his head at the question.  
  
“I phoned my parents, and they told me they could send us some money by the end of this week.” The raven said nervously. “It’ll be enough for us for at least another two months, you know? By then, we would have saved enough for the subsequent months, too. So it’s all settled – ”  
  
“You phoned them?” Uruha repeats, angrily, and it startles Aoi for a moment. The raven haired looks up to the blond, his eyes throbbing in fear, and Aoi nods his head timidly, hoping he hadn’t done something wrong. He knows Uruha doesn’t want their parents to know about their financial difficulties, but things had just gotten _so_ bad that they didn’t have any other choice now – and Aoi had to do it, just to ensure they could keep living, just to ensure they could have food and a house to stay in.  
  
“I had to do it, ‘ruha,” Aoi says softly, but the blond doesn’t think the same. Because his eyes have darkened and his face is in a glare now, looking irately to the raven.  
  
“I told you I _didn’t_ want them to know.” Uruha tries to say calmly, though the anger is evident in his voice. “We can deal with this on our own, Aoi. Look, call them back up and tell them we don’t need it. I don’t want their money.”  
  
“We have no choice, Uru!” Aoi protests, shaking his head. “Just throw your pride aside for a moment and let them help us, _okay_? We can’t keep living this way. We’re running out of everything, and – ”  
  
“I’ll get a loan from the bank or _something_!” Uruha yells, and it silences Aoi for a moment. The blond never yelled at the raven. “I don’t want their money, okay, Aoi? I’m paying for your textbooks. I’ll work OT tomorrow, and the next day, and the next, and I’ll get enough money at this rate. I promise, I’ll get the money ready by the end of this week. And none of it is going to be our parents’ money, got it?”  
  
Aoi holds back the tears that were threatening to spill. “We need help, Uruha.”  
  
“I don’t want them to think of me as someone who can’t even treat you well enough,” Uruha growls, upset. “I promised them on our wedding day that I was going to take care of you, and if I can’t do that for you anymore, how am I ever going to answer up to them?”  
  
“You don’t need to.” The raven chokes back a sob. “They understand. The times are bad, and we’re going to need help. Please, just let them help, alright?”  
  
The response is immediate. “No. I’m not accepting a single cent of their money, and if I see it still coming in, I’m going to be really upset with you, Aoi.”  
  
Aoi shivers a little, at Uruha’s words, and he looks back down to his food, untouched and cold by now, things he didn’t have an appetite for anymore. He doesn’t know if he should be happy at Uruha’s insistence to work hard for him, or if he should be upset at Uruha’s indignance, if he should be upset at the prideful nature of his.  
  
“I’m really tired, so I’m going to bed now, Aoi.” The blond gets up from his seat, removing his plate from the table, and after he dumps them into the sink, he trudges his way back to the bedroom, a place that has become distant and quiet to the both of them lately.  
  
“Goodnight, ‘ruha,” Aoi says quietly, as Uruha passes by him, and he wonders if the blond will notice that he’s forgotten to give the raven his usual goodnight kiss.  
  
“Goodnight.”  
  
When the bedroom door slams shut and the kitchen has become silent once more, Aoi curls up against his chair and cries.  
  
~  
  
“Are you coming back home early today?” Aoi’s voice is soft, through the phone receiver, and he tries to hear Uruha’s response over the loud and chaotic background noise of his. It’s evening time now, the time the blond usually got back from work, but lately, for the past few days, the blond’s kept to his promise and has been working overnight shifts, shifts that last way too long into the morning. By the time the blond is back home, Aoi’s already up and gone to the university, and by the time Aoi gets back home, Uruha’s long gone for work already.  
  
“I can’t, Aoi. You won’t need to cook dinner for me today.” Uruha’s voice is cold, even over the phone, and Aoi looks back down to the mattress beneath his feet, nodding his head in reply.  
  
“Okay, Uru. Be safe at work, okay?”  
  
“Alright. Sleep well tonight, sweetheart.”  
  
Aoi doesn’t even have the chance to respond before the phone call is already cut off, and the raven throws the phone back down, gripping the pillows and blankets close to him on the bed. He doesn’t want to have dinner today, or at least not without the blond, but he doesn’t want to say that to Uruha, doesn’t want Uruha to chide him over his foolishness of not eating. Aoi hasn’t seen the blond physically in _days_ , and the only times he ever gets to speak to him are over the phone, or when Aoi’s already soundly asleep, and he’s disturbed by the soft dipping of the bed as Uruha climbs in to lie next to him. Uruha doesn’t kiss him, though, not anymore. Uruha used to do that, even if Aoi was asleep, but these days, he’s been too tired to do so, he’s been too remote to Aoi.  
  
He knows the blond means well, but he doesn’t know if the blond has realized it himself, that the very thing that they were working hard for was slowly driving them apart. Uruha was obsessed with keeping their relationship alive with money, but he seemed to have forgotten Aoi in the process, seemed to have forgotten to give Aoi the kisses and tender touches and everything he used to do, to make the raven feel loved, to make the raven feel wanted and secure. Now he just feels like a burden, a responsibility, and he hates feeling in such a way.  
  
Maybe they shouldn’t even have gotten married.  
  
~  
  
It’s only three days later that they finally have a chance to eat together again, on a Sunday afternoon, just a casual home made lunch together in their own apartment. This time, Uruha’s doing the cooking, whipping up a French cuisine he had learnt from the chef at the restaurant he was working at, and Aoi’s more than happy to let the blond take over the kitchen, because it meant Uruha was being thoughtful again, something Aoi’s been missing all these while. When they finally settle down and Aoi’s poured some wine for the both of them, Uruha seems like himself again, smiling as he looks to the raven.  
  
“You’re going to really like this dish,” The blond comments, and Aoi strains a smile at that. “I tasted it and thought of you immediately. You always liked the sweeter, saltier things.”  
  
“I’m sure it’s great.” The raven says, picking up his fork and knife, feeding himself a bite. Uruha awaits his response, nervous, and when Aoi nods and tells him how good it is, the blond’s face lights up immediately.  
  
“It’s nice, isn’t it?” Uruha laughs a little, and Aoi looks quickly back down to his plate, feeling a sour feeling take over him. He knows he should be happy, because they’re finally eating together again, but in the period that they’d been distant from each other, Aoi has done a lot of thinking, and Aoi thinks he’s made a decision, finally, after much crying and careful deliberation.  
  
“Are you okay, honey?” The blond asks, concerned, wondering why the raven is not talking suddenly. He knows he hasn’t been there for Aoi these few days, but he thought he’d be happy today, because they’d finally have time together, finally. The raven cringes at the blond’s pet name for him, because he knows he doesn’t deserve it, he doesn’t deserve it for the words he was about to say to him.  
  
“It’s just…” Aoi looks guiltily away, and Uruha has to lean in, cupping the raven’s jaw in one hand, gazing worriedly to his younger lover. “Uru…”  
  
“Look at me, okay?” The blond whispers, and as Aoi turns back to him and meets his eyes, Uruha realizes there are tears seeping out from the corners of his eyes, tears that probably mean horrible things to come. Uruha rushes to wipe them away with his fingers, frowning in worry, and he hushes the raven haired quickly, wondering what is wrong with Aoi again. “Did something happen? Do you want to tell me about it?”  
  
Aoi tries hard to blink the tears away. “’ruha… I…” He watches as the blond waits, silently, his eyebrows furrowing in anticipation. “I… I think it’s better if I move back to my parents’ place… for a while.”  
  
Uruha’s quiet for a moment, then he draws back in his seat, sucking in a loud breath.  
  
“You want to move back?” His voice is hurt, though it’s barely above a whisper. Aoi can feel his heart breaking, already.  
  
“I’ve been really confused lately...” The raven continues. “I think it’s better if we take a break from each other… okay? It’s better, too, because it won’t be so hard on you, and you can – ”  
  
“Are you doing this because I can’t afford anything anymore?” Uruha’s voice is still quiet, and heartbroken, and tired, and Aoi feels the tears running down his own cheeks, shaking his head profusely.  
  
“No, I’m not.” The raven breathes through his tears. “I still love you, Uruha. But I don’t want to stress you out anymore; you’ve been so tired lately, and it’s really hard on you to support both of us, I know. Maybe we could take a break for a month or two, and after things have calmed down – ”  
  
“Then why are you leaving me?” The blond’s voice comes out strangled, almost in a crying noise, and Aoi has to stop himself from sobbing at the sight of the tears trickling down Uruha’s face. “I know I’m not much, now, and I can’t give you the things I used to give to you, Aoi, but… But I promise it’ll get better. I’ve been working overnight just to get more money for us, you see? It’s working out, and if I keep this up, we’ll get enough by the end of the month, I promise.”  
  
“I don’t want you to get so tired,” Aoi says insistently, but Uruha shakes his head, his voice coming out broken and crushed.  
  
“I really want you to stay, please…”  
  
And for some reason, it angers Aoi, in a way that he knows Uruha doesn’t deserve to say this to him, in a way that he knows Uruha hasn’t shown that he means such a thing in the past week.  
  
“We haven’t seen each other in days,” Aoi points out, distraught, and he watches as Uruha’s face morphs in confusion. “I can’t just…pretend that it’s okay, Uruha. You haven’t been touching me, nor kissing me, and we don’t even embrace anymore. I don’t even know if you’re my husband anymore, because you don’t seem to care, you know? I feel like if things are going to be like this, then…”  
  
Uruha’s gaze faltered. “Then?”  
  
“Then…” The raven swallowed back his tears. “Then maybe we shouldn’t even have gotten married.”  
  
The blond’s red eyes flicker away, to the distance, listening to the soft beats of his broken heart resonate in his ears. He doesn’t know if Aoi means it, and he doesn’t know if he wants to believe it. But the pain in his mind and heart is real, right now, and he knows it’s true. He hasn’t been the best husband to Aoi, and he definitely doesn’t deserve begging Aoi to stay with him when he’s done nothing to deserve that. So, with a tired breath, he parts his lips once more, nodding tiredly.  
  
“When do you plan to leave?”  
  
Aoi casts his eyes away. “I’m planning tomorrow afternoon. I have no classes tomorrow, so it’ll be perfect.”  
  
Uruha ignores the pulsing hurt running through his veins. “I’ll drive you there, okay?”  
  
The raven’s eyes fly up in reluctance. “We have no money for gas, ‘ruha.”  
  
“I have enough,” The blond says softly, and Aoi keeps silent immediately, knowing it must be the last ounce of pride Uruha can hold to himself, it must be the only thing left Uruha feels he can do for Aoi. So the raven just nods his head, and goes back to eating his dinner in silence, ignoring the fact that both of their hearts were breaking by the second, ignoring the fact that both of them were not going to see each other for a long time after this.  
  
~  
  
Uruha makes his way to the side of his bed, taking a seat down, glancing briefly over to the photo frame by the bed. A photo of them taken in happier times; Uru’s lips against Aoi’s left cheek, the raven’s lips parted in soft laughter, holding the camera high up to capture a shot of them in front of the high stature of the Eiffel Tower. Paris, the first destination on their honeymoon, the place Aoi had always wanted to go but never got the chance to. Uruha had saved up enough by their wedding just to plan for this trip, and when he had surprised Aoi with two tickets to Paris one day after their wedding night, Aoi had gasped and hugged him in tears, having never been happier in his life.  
  
It had never occurred to him that things could have changed so drastically in just a few months; that they could get so unhappy, so nervous, so wrecked by what life has had to offer them. Uruha’s upset, he really is, but he knows he has no right to be. He’s the one, that hadn’t been able to provide enough for Aoi, even though he had promised to, and he’s the one that had to force Aoi to struggle with him, even though he always told the raven he would be the one taking care of him instead. He always thought they both could make it through both the good and bad times, but circumstances proved otherwise. And he doesn’t want to force the raven to be unhappy anymore, he really doesn’t want to make the raven feel like he has no choice in this matter.  
  
He reaches for the photo frame, fingering it gently, admiring the way Aoi looked so happy then. He hadn’t seen that smile upon the raven’s face for so long; and he wonders whether he was the one that had caused it to go away. He knows he’ll miss Aoi once he leaves – he really will, and he wonders how he’ll be able to cope. Sleeping without Aoi next to him on the bed; missing the sound of his voice… Would the raven still call him? Would the raven still ask him how was work, and would the raven still ask him whether he’s eaten his dinner yet?  
  
“Not going to sleep yet?” Aoi’s quiet voice startles him a little, and as Uruha turns, he sees his lover taking a seat next to him, crawling back to his other side of the bed. “Won’t you have to wake up early for work tomorrow? Go to sleep soon, Uru.” Aoi’s going to leave him the next day, and yet his voice still sounds so gentle, so loving. Just like he always was; just like how he’d always asked after Uruha, how he’d always cared for the blond. Had Uruha not notice just how much Aoi loved him as much as he did for the raven? The mere thought of having these small gestures disappear by tomorrow is scaring him…  
  
… and Uruha just wants to cry.  
  
“Aoi?” The blond asks, hesitant, and he watches as the raven turns to him, lying on the bed, smiling slightly to him.  
  
“Mm hmm?” Aoi answers, patting the empty spot next to him, gesturing for Uruha to lie next to him. “It’s getting late, you know…”  
  
“Do you remember the first time that we met?” Uruha says, abruptly, and Aoi’s confused for a moment. But he soon nods, and as he sinks into thought, his lips gradually curve up into a smile.  
  
“At the café, right?” Aoi tilts his head to the side. “The counter called for you to collect your coffee, and I thought it was mine, and we both got into a huge fight over it.” He’s giggling at the thought of it. “I called you a bastard and said you were the most ridiculous person I’d ever met.”  
  
Uruha smiled sadly in response. “You said it was yours, so I had to give it to you and wait for the next one. You didn’t even say thank you.”  
  
Aoi rolled his eyes, still smiling. “And then we both left our phones on the counter, and I was in a rush, so I ran off, taking yours instead. And I remember you yelling at me over the phone about how annoying I was.”  
  
“But then I looked through the photos on your phone and thought, oh, he’s actually kinda hot,” Uruha laughed, and Aoi shot him a look. “I thought, ‘he’s cute, but he has such a fiery temper, and all he knows to do is to steal other people’s coffee.’ ”  
  
“ _Then_ ,” Aoi pointed out, huffing. “You said you’d give me my phone back on the condition that I treated you to another cup of coffee. You really were a jerk.”  
  
“It was just an excuse for a date,” Uruha smiled, feeling his heart ache at the memory. “It was a fun date, wasn’t it?”  
  
Aoi curled up against the covers. “We decided to watch a movie later that evening, spontaneously, and you bought me popcorn and drinks.”  
  
“And you spilled them all over me when you screamed at the ghost parts during the movie.” Uruha chuckled, and Aoi’s face turned peach pink.  
  
“Then you tried to put your arm over me.” The raven teased, looking up to the blond. “I remember telling you, ‘if you touch me one more time, I’m going to file a police report for sexual harassment.’ ”  
  
Uruha tried to contain his smile. “You said that no one puts arms over their dates on first dates. You called me a pervert or something worse. I can’t remember.”  
  
“I can’t remember, too.” Aoi murmured thoughtfully, smiling back to the blond. “I remember looking to you and crying for us to get out of the theatre. The movie was horrible.”  
  
“And I remember looking at you in the darkness, just like this.” Uruha started, quietly, gazing gently down to the younger raven. “And your eyes were shining in the darkness, and your lips were trembling and pouting.”  
  
“And then… you kissed me.” Aoi’s voice grew softer, watching as the blond leaned in towards him.  
  
“For the first time.” Uruha whispered, moving his hands to grip the back of the raven’s hair, pulling him closer to him. His fingers stroke past up his hair, pressing his lips gently against the raven’s, and it’s only a brief kiss, before Uruha pulls away again, looking deeply into Aoi’s eyes, eyes that were begging the raven to change his mind, to stay, to tell him he never wanted to leave the blond and that he didn’t mind staying for just another day. But all Aoi does is gaze back, silently, and Uruha feels on the verge of tears; he leans in once more, swiping his tongue against the raven’s lips, and as Aoi parts them slightly in response, the blond pushes his tongue in, and soon they’re kissing, at first slowly; then more and more passionately, harder and harder by the second, the raven leaning his body into Uruha’s, reaching up to grip at the blond’s hair, reaching to arch into every of the blond’s touches.  
  
Uruha gently pushes Aoi back against the bed, leaving his lips as he does so, and his hand caresses past the side of the raven’s cheek, watching as Aoi’s raven hair spreads out on the pillow underneath him. Aoi looks so beautiful to him, like this, and Uruha knows he hasn’t been a good husband so far, hasn’t had time to savor moments like these with Aoi. It scares him to think that when tomorrow comes, he won’t get to touch or feel Aoi like this anymore, and it’s with that thought that he presses his mouth against the side of the raven’s neck, planting more kisses, swirling his tongue and making soft bites against his soft skin. Aoi shuts his eyes and makes a small noise of content, something that the blond always loved hearing, and Uruha’s encouraged to do more, running his hands up the raven’s chest, slipping underneath his shirt, and playing with the navel piercing that he knows will be there. Aoi’s making muffled noises, feeling Uruha’s mouth slowly move down to his stomach, kissing the skin there, his lips slowly travelling up with his hands pushing the cloth of the shirt higher and higher up his chest.  
  
His lips locate around the pink nub of flesh that’s there, and as he licks teasingly at Aoi’s nipple, the raven moans softly, feeling his pants tighten at the very notion. He always was very sensitive; Uruha knows, and he uses this to his advantage, constantly teasing the raven and making him feel good. The blond’s other hand reaches down to stroke lightly at the front of Aoi’s pants, and as the raven pushes himself up into Uruha’s hand, desperate to feel more, the feeling of heat surrounding his bulge too much for him to take; Uruha bites down on the hard nub of flesh beneath his lips, and Aoi cries out in both pain and pleasure, feeling the first signs of sweat start to drip down the side of his face.  
  
“Do you remember the first time we made love like this?” Uruha whispers, suddenly, and it takes Aoi a while to register his words, to reply.  
  
“We were at the beach,” Aoi’s voice is strangled, distracted mildly by the fact that the blond’s hands were undoing the front of Aoi’s pants, tugging them easily down the raven’s small waist. “We stayed up till three in the morning, talking, and… and we made love, against the sand.”  
  
“You said it was your first time,” Uruha says, smiling, throwing the raven’s pants over to the floor. “I told you I was going to be the first and last man you would ever do it with.”  
  
“And you told me you were going to marry me someday,” Aoi gasps, feeling the blond’s cold hand suddenly cup around his hot and sensitive flesh, now naked and bare for Uruha to see, and makes a loud cry as the blond traces a finger around the head, then dips it in the slit, moving and circling teasingly.  
  
“You said yes,” Uruha groaned, upon hearing the raven’s loud moans, increasing its volume by the second as the blond stroked harder and harder at the raven’s length, moving up and down increasingly, lips planting soft kisses against it occasionally. Aoi’s hand flies to his mouth, cupping it embarrassedly, unable to contain his moans, but Uruha reaches a hand up to pull it away, shaking his head satisfiedly.  
  
“Let me hear you, Aoi,” The blond whispers, and the raven nods, his face scrunched up in pleasure, lips slightly parted and noisy with cries.  
  
“We did it a lot of times; didn’t we, that night?” Uruha continues, and Aoi bites his lip, only able to nod with the feeling of pleasure shooting up in his body every few seconds or so. “You said you were so glad it was me.”  
  
“I loved you,” Aoi chokes out, and as he flutters his eyes back up to gaze up to the blond hovering over him, he realizes how sad Uruha looks right now, how upset his gaze looks. “I still love you so much, Uru.”  
  
Uruha’s hand squeezes around Aoi’s member for a moment, and Aoi gasps once more, feeling the first few trails of precum slowly ooze out, dripping and trickling all over Uruha’s hands in a mess. The raven shuts his eyes back down, ashamed at how easily he succumbs to the blond’s touches, but the blond just smiles, and bends over to bring Aoi’s lips into another kiss, kissing him roughly, as if it’s going to be their last kiss for a long while now; bruising Aoi’s soft lips in the process, biting painfully against the raven’s lower lip. Aoi makes another small noise of pleasure, before he feels Uruha’s hand begin to pump around Aoi’s length once more, something that almost sends the raven over the edge and spiral out of control.  
  
“Please, now,” The raven pulls away from the kiss, almost begging in a soft voice, and Uruha nods, understanding, bringing his hands away, reaching for the bottle of lube they kept always in the drawers by the bedside. Squeezing some of the cold liquid all over his fingers, he rubbed at them until they were coated well enough, before lowering down to Aoi’s legs, spreading them a distance apart thoughtfully. Aoi shivers as he feels Uruha’s hands against the inner sides of his thighs, his fingers tracing imaginary patterns against his skin, small gestures that give the raven just the right amount of comfort he needs. Aoi just nods, allowing the blond to do as he pleases, and as Uruha moves a hand in between his legs, he strokes tentatively at the raven’s entrance, locating it easily from experience. He looks back up, only to see the raven’s face red with blush and hair wet and damp from sweat, looking more beautiful than anything he’d ever seen. He tries hard to ignore his own hardening member, knowing it’d all pay off once he’s done with preparing his lover.  
  
Aoi lets out a moan as the blond’s first finger pushes in, though it’s more out of the initial pain than pleasure. It’s still feeling a little uncomfortable, so Uruha kisses the side of the raven’s thigh comfortingly, before pulling it out, and then driving it back in once more. Aoi’s hands scramble on the sheets beneath him, gripping at them tightly, feeling the blond insert a second finger in no time, moving in and out at a faster pace. He’s slowly getting used to the pain, and as his blond lover begins scissoring his two fingers inside, Aoi feels the pleasure begin to set in, the heat beginning to stifle him. Uruha’s fingers are stroking the sides of Aoi’s inner walls, something that sends pleasure running up and down Aoi’s body, and the pain melts away entirely, as the raven begins parting his lips and making panting noises once more, moving and bucking against the blond’s fingers impatiently. By the time Uruha adds a third finger, Aoi’s crying out, feeling the blond angle it deep into him, finding his prostate easily with experience. Aoi’s words are coming out jumbled and messy, but Uruha recognizes the raven mumbling to him to hit it more, and that’s what the blond does, watching as the raven writhed and moaned against his fingers with every push and hit against his sweet spot.  
  
“It’s enough,” Aoi says, quickly, and the blond knows he has to stop now, because he wants to cum with the raven together, and not have him finish off too soon. Uruha withdraws his fingers hurriedly, then reaches for the front of his own pants, unbuckling it and unzipping it impatiently, pushing them down his thighs, and discarding it carelessly onto the ground. He steps out of them, feeling more relieved now that his erection is free from his tight pants, and he’s not surprised to find himself fully hard by now, at full erect length, veins obvious and his head leaking. The blond quickly squeezes lube all over his hands and member, and he can’t resist a groan as he gives a swift stroke to his cock, knowing just how wanting and needy he was right now.  
  
“Remember the time we saw your parents for the first time?” Uruha murmurs, kneeling onto the bed, pushing Aoi’s legs further apart. Aoi breathes in deeply, nodding, preparing for what is to come, and he gasps when he feels his lover’s cock press against his entrance, giving him a little taste of how good and large it’s going to feel inside of him.  
  
“We were having dinner,” Aoi whispers, eyes almost watery, looking up to Uruha’s loving eyes. “And your hands started slipping into my pants.” The blond pushes inside of the raven, eyes fluttering shut as he does so, and as the raven starts to feel the first of the blond’s head moving past his wring of muscles, Aoi slips out a loud moan, closing his eyes shut as well. His noises only grow louder as Uruha’s cock fully slides in, until he’s fully sheathed inside of Aoi. The raven feels _so_ stretched, his walls slowly contracting around the blond’s length, and the amount of tightness and contraction around his cock causes Uruha to groan a bit.  
  
“I fingered you under the dining table,” Uruha made an approving noise, humming lightly at the memory. He reaches an arm out, pulling Aoi up from the bed, holding him close to him, until the raven’s head is up and leaning against the blond’s own sweaty chest. He coaxes the raven’s legs up as well, wrapping them tightly around Uruha’s own waist, and as Aoi moves in nearer to him, he lets out a soft moan as he feels Uruha’s cock hit deeper inside of him, the intense feeling taking over him.  
  
“My parents thought I was going crazy with the amount of noises I was making,” Aoi smiles a little, and as Uruha’s hands claw at his raven hair from behind, Aoi’s own hands reach up to the blond’s back, holding him tightly to him as well. “But it felt good.”  
  
“It did, didn’t it?” Uruha groaned, slowly pulling his cock a distance out, and the raven mewls, only to slam back in once more, causing to raven to cry out loud, breathing in deeply with the jolt of pleasure it sends running through him. “Your parents said I was the best person you’ve brought back home so far.”  
  
“If only they knew,” Aoi gasps, then feels the blond jerk harshly inside of him once more, digging painfully into the raven’s hair as Uruha begins to ride Aoi, establishing a quick pace inside of him. The blond pants loudly, slipping out contented groans every few seconds or so, and Aoi’s whimpers match his, digging his nails tightly into Uruha’s back. The raven’s sweaty chest occasionally slips up against Uruha’s own, and his hardened cock moves and presses up against Uruha’s body as the blond thrusts harder and faster into him, something that makes the raven blush uncontrollably by the second.  
  
“I love you so much, Aoi,” Uruha shuts his eyes, his lips half part in moans, and he moves to lift one of Aoi’s legs up, placing it over his shoulder, angling his cock to hit at a different spot this time, something that causes the raven to gasp, and as he presses Aoi deeper into him, the raven almost erupts in a crying mess, something that Uruha knows means he’s found Aoi’s sweet spot once more.  
  
He repeatedly thrusts in deeper, and faster, and as the raven’s hands and legs slowly weaken and begin to slip from Uruha’s embrace, the blond grips him tighter, riding him erratically, making sure to hit Aoi’s prostate at each go, making sure he doesn’t lose the feeling of Aoi’s raw walls tightening around him with each thrust.  
  
“So… good…” The raven’s shaking, throwing his head back, eyes closed, mouth wide open, allowing his delicate body to be ridden over and over again, and as he feels himself coming to a close, he screams Uruha’s name loudly, something that signals the blond to reach for Aoi’s own cock, jerking at it and rubbing at the leaking head with his own thumb. “Please… oh… god… yes… Uru…!”  
  
“Remember the time I knelt down to propose to you at your birthday party,” Uruha whispers desperately into the raven’s ear, watching as sheens of sweat began to run profusely down Aoi’s face and neck, serving to make the sight of the raven look all the more sexier. “Remember how you cried and said you’d never leave me,” Uruha pumps Aoi’s cock harder, straddling the raven faster, and Aoi nods, whimpering, scratching and clawing at Uruha’s back. “Remember how I told you that you would always look as beautiful as the time I saw you, for the first time…”  
  
As the blond pushes into his prostate once more, the raven sobs, screaming Uruha’s name a second time, and with a final brush to the tip of his cock, his orgasm rushes through him quickly, white hot pleasure blinds his vision and his legs turn limp and weak. Cum dirties his own naked stomach, and as he’s about to fall over, Uruha holds him tightly in place, bringing his lips into a soft kiss, easing his eyes shut and feeling a million fluttery happy and sad feelings overwhelm him. With a final thrust, Uruha groans into Aoi’s mouth as he releases inside of the raven, and Aoi shudders at the hot liquid that’s slowly filling him up, the blond’s throbbing cock still inside of him.  
  
“Can you not go?” Uruha says softly, still not pulling out of Aoi, and he hugs the raven close to him, a sob slipping past his lips soon after.  
  
Aoi’s eyes widen in surprise for a moment, then he slowly reciprocates the embrace, feeling the blond grip up tightly at his hair, burying his head timidly into Aoi’s neck.  
  
“These times are hard, and they’re making us crazy,” The raven whispers, and Uruha gives him a light squeeze at that mention.  
  
“Don’t give up on me, baby, please.” The blond pleads, quietly, and the raven’s mouth forms a small and unsure smile.  
  
“It’s going to be so hard for the both of us,” Aoi says, reluctantly, but Uruha presses further in, in response, and the raven moans a little with that movement.  
  
“I’ll do it, I’ll fix it, I promise.” The blond flutters his eyes shut. “We’ll work things out, won’t we? You and me. We’ll do it, we always make things fine in the end.”  
  
“We do?” The raven pulls back a little, gazing back into Uruha’s twinkling eyes. “We’ll do it together, Uruha?”  
  
“Yeah,” Uruha breathes, forcing a smile, reaching a hand up to cup Aoi’s cheek in his. “Please, just stay. We’ll make it through, and you won’t need to be away from me.”  
  
Aoi cocks his head to the side for a moment, admiring the blond’s resolute and determined countenance for awhile. Then he smiles, his eyes growing watery, and he shakes his head, curling up against Uruha’s chest, nodding his head happily.  
  
“I won’t leave,” Aoi murmurs, and Uruha feels his heart lighten up at that, feels his smile slowly widen genuinely.  
  
“About your parents’ money…” The blond begins, unsure, and Aoi looks up quickly.  
  
“Yes?”  
  
“I was thinking… maybe we could borrow it for awhile. We’ll pay them back, of course, but… for now…” Uruha looks away, clearly embarrassed, but all Aoi does is smile, and clutch the blond’s hand tightly in his.  
  
And he knows it’s going to be a rough time ahead, but he’s prepared, and he feels like he could try to do this all over again, with Uruha, and everything would work out just fine. Just as it did when they had met…  
  
…for the first time.

**Author's Note:**

> I keep listening to _the script_ , so...


End file.
